Monday, January 17, 2011

into the sky

felt the wind on my face,
as your wings flapped by,
a comfort swept through me,
when you disappear into the horizon.

fly~take your journey up,
deep into the sky~
don't you even think of, giving up~
we were meant to fall,
so we could learn one day..
to stand tall~~

but beware of the clouds,
tempting as they can be,
just remember your limits..
as you.....

fly~take your journey up,
deep in the sky~
don't get over exited, over your head,
if you fall from the clouds..
even screaming out loud...
it'll be too late.

plated in thin-glass

Maybe i pay too much attention of my surroundings,
that sometimes i think too much, complicate simple matters.
I am so "thoughtful" that instead of responding towards an issue,
I ended up taking too much time, judging those few miserably logic response which i have in mind.
not once, not twice.. but most of the time.
I waste not only those pathetic ticks on my clock, but i dragged the precious time spent by those who waited for me.
Thanks for all your patience as well as time spent on me~ although deep down inside you all knew that i wasn't worth it. Sorry for all the disappointments that i have given you all.. words that i used in hurting all of you, remind me with a slap the next time we meet.

I am not a depressing person, nor a drama ass-king. i am just who i am, a normal person, trying to make some sense by conversing with himself. I doubt that there would be any readers nor followers of these crap that i write.
Writing them  somehow, eases the emotional fluctuation that i face~ every now and then.

Monday, January 10, 2011

things they say as we met:

"i can't recognize you"
"i thought for a moment there, you look familiar."
"Is it really you William?"
"oh my god~! Willl~!!!"
"William Koong? you're William rite?"
"Gosh, if you bald you head again i might recognize you better man~!"

recently i have been getting a lot of these responses wherever i see my friends..after being MIA for a month or two~ i didn't see any obvious change in me, but somehow they all say i look different, better i hope.. and surprisingly someone even told me that i feel is that so? i do not know..just go with the
did i really change that much? am i that different already? nah.... i'm still an idiot.

the Out-of-Reach's preach

i'm not interesting~ i'm boring,

i'm not fun~i'm lame,

i'm not good looking~i'm fugly,

i'm not smart~i'm dumb

i'm not romantic~i'm dull

i'm not appreciated~i'm a disappointment,

i'm not perfect~i'm flawed,

i'm not the one~i'm the other one. 

*i'm not hiding~i'm healing*

 *keep breathing~keep believing*

 *i'm not hoping~i'm accepting*

Monday, January 3, 2011

an inflatable punctured heart

slowly~lifted up from the chest,
take it out, run a test..
inflate~ with your breathing air,
then give it a needle jab...

deflated~ deformed beyond compare,
leave it behind the alley, where no one would care.
abandoned~ so cold and so scared,
because no one will notice that.....

I'm an inflatable punctured heart~
just give me a chance, pick me up~
all i needed was a simple patch.....

Why am i born to be broken~
thrown away after i'm opened,
all you could do was to raise me up....

slowly~the cold crept inside,
the rain freezes me...bit-by-bit.
inflate~now i'm beyond repair,
as the sun in the morning..dries-me-up.

deflated~i am torn to pieces..
impossible to even know it's a baby
abandoned~at least it's cold no more.
warm in a hungry-..puppy's-..belly...

I'm an inflatable punctured heart~
if i was given a chance, and picked up~
given a patch by a lonely widow...

Why they wanted me broken~
after months being together, with her...
I could've been an obedient child....

I was once an inflatable punctured heart..
Maybe she was scared too from the start..
cus i saw her tears as we depart...

a song inspired by the brutality of humans abandoning newly born babies, throwing them away where 80% of them often do not survive....and more which were never found. 

I love wondermilk~!!

Wondermilk is wonderful,
a cuppa Macadamian milk served hot,
with a Red Velvet cupcake <3
If i were to be accompanied by you as well...
there couldn't be anything more that i would want :-)

can i ask you out for the second time?

what can i say to see you?
i just wanted to have a drink with you..
just wanted to talk.
wanted someone to talk to..
someone real, someone like you.
we do not know each other well enough..
i am not as good as i seem, you assume me to be.
i'm an idiot, a loser, an all-talker,..
sometimes i do not know where i stand.. am i even an option now?
am i on display for selection?
i always work...
yet i also wanted to get closer to you...
i'm afraid that i might disturb you...
make you feel uncomfortable'

It's not easy being me...
I wanted to tell you more about me..
as well as to know you better....
i dont know how much time i'm left...
or how many chances that i get...
but i just know one simple thing...
you might not know it...
I like you as well....

Saturday, January 1, 2011

If tomorrow was my last.

If tomorrow was my last day,
i would take all my money,
to play all day,
not me.

Here i am, standing alone..
facing the glass,
that separates my room...
i told myself
that it's ok, and  nothing is wrong~
and deep inside, i need to be strong~

but when the blinds are open,
by the doctors glove,
the words he spoken though full of love,
cracked my head like an egg...

If tomorrow was my last day..
i wont care about my money...
i'll spend it all on my family~
making one last moment, happy...

being raised and cared,
taught on how to prepare..
the wrongs that i had done,
as a growing up son..

can never~ever be forgiven...
can never~ever be mistaken...
I'll never ~ever get to repay them.

a single world of thoughts.

elevation, as it creeps into the mind.
the palpation in my eyes, takes control.
a doll thats left behind, with one leg gone.
could serve no child, companion.

the world... is a big black place of gathered thoughts..
those thoughts.... were made of needle sewn remorse...

reflection, of an unwanted look in the mirror.
depression, created by pressing pen on paper.
a sentence of apology, which doesn't contains sorry
defies what it was meant to be..

the world.. is a big black place of gathered thoughts...
these thoughts.... will sometimes cause the lights going off..

Complexion, of a face that reappear everywhere.
remembrance, of experiences that was once shared.
a book thats torn, without a reader to belong.
burns itself inflame..

your not any different from all the others.
the others... have all their time to give ...................

a song to remember on "fake plastic tree"

Her green plastic watering can 
For her fake Chinese rubber plant 
In the fake plastic earth 
That she bought from a rubber man 
In a town full of rubber plans 
To get rid of itself 

It wears her out, it wears her out 
It wears her out, it wears her out 

She lives with a broken man 
A cracked polystyrene man 
Who just crumbles and burns 
He used to do surgery 
For girls in the eighties 
But gravity always wins 

It wears her out, it wears her out 
It wears her out, it wears her out 

She looks like the real thing 
She tastes like the real thing 
My fake plastic love 
But I can't help the feeling 
I could blow through the ceiling 
If I just turn and run 

It wears her out, it wears her out 
It wears her out, it wears her out 

If I could be who you wanted 
If I could be who you wanted all the time